Of Angels and Angst
by 3zioand5ofia
Summary: A project from school a couple of months back. The kiss from the perspectives of Alexander, Melissa and Meshak. Sorry it's not perfect as this was only a homework: nothing major. Just thought I'd share it with you.


AUTHOR'S NOTE: A project from school from a few months back. It's not perfect, but I just wanted to put it up because...yeah...it's Melissa and Alexander's first kiss from Alex, Melissa and Meshak's perspectives. Enjoy!

* * *

**ALEXANDER**

The verse drifted from her lips, sweet as honey. Her delicate fingers stroked the keys of the virginals, one by one to sing out a beautiful melody. Her eyes glittered with placid enthusiasm as I joined in. I weaved through the notes with the tune that I knew. Our voices soared in unison; they fitted together perfectly.

_This_ was what I wanted. This was the place where I could truly escape Father's toffee-nosed estate meetings and the overwhelming grandeur which I have had to become used to. I wanted to stay here, singing my heart out with Melissa.

_Melissa._ I couldn't stop repeating such a beautiful name in my head. It was a certain kind of torture, being forbidden to touch her. She wasn't there to just stand and look pretty. I desired very much to stay with her; to have her company, heart-to-heart. _What are these feelings of lust? Is it all nature's way?_

My heart began racing as she played the most beautiful chords of the piece. For a moment I forgot where I was and what I was doing there. I forgot that my siblings were present, along with my best friend. Melissa was all that mattered. She smiled in pride at herself. At _us_. Stunned by her beauty like I'd never seen her before, I swallowed hard before rasping the next few bars.

I wasn't thinking about music anymore. What could be more important than music? If it was her on my mind, then surely she was...she was the one in my heart? This thought swept up through my mind. I placed a hand- gently- on her shoulder. She didn't flinch but flushed slightly, sat at the virginals like she belonged there. The candle flame flicked romantically towards her face, lighting up her flawless eyes like stars. Did I dare? Well, I only had two more days at Ashbrook. _If not now, then when?_

* * *

**MELISSA**

My heart lifted higher than the roof when his soft touch met my shoulder. The magic in his hands flew through my veins, paralysing my hands. They ceased from playing the virginals. I suddenly felt numb and sick with nerves. What should a girl do in this situation? I blushed furiously and tried to compose myself. An awkward silence hung over us like a dense mist.

_Smile. Just...smile. It is the least you can do. Stop breathing like that. Sit up properly. Now you are squinting into his eyes. Mama says it is rude to stare. Be quiet, heart! Don't beat so loudly! For once, can I not just-_

That was when it happened. I was still gazing up at Alexander. Irresistible, handsome, full of passion, magical. The list went on.

The love in his eyes twinkled. My stomach flipped and wrenched violently. He bent down slowly. I flinched: his lips were touching my forehead. He planted a tender kiss on my forehead.

I struggled not to blush. My pulse rate tripled. I looked up into the eyes of the young man standing over me in wonder. The soft contour of his face was unbearable. I couldn't wait any longer. I stood up and closed my eyes. His hand went from my shoulder to round my back. He pulled me slowly closer.

_Forget about what Mama would say. Forget the world. Just let this moment happen._

* * *

**MESHAK**

_No. No, no NO. _Was I really seeing this? My mouth dropped open in heartbroken horror. My angel...MY...angel...in the foul little boy's arms with so much love; I felt beyond nauseous. The shock hadn't hit me enough. My heart began to throb angrily.

_ She's MY angel. not his. It isn't fair! The only reason I live. No. NO._

Jester sniffed my clenched fist in concern. I didn't care. I was broken. I could not even suppress a wild bawl from my soul. Its raw devastation rang out with deafening force. Hot tears streamed from my eyes. Emotions whipped up a mighty storm in my head: rage jealousy, heartbreak, shock, loss and other pieces of memories like my mother, my hellish father, the innocent children, the stifled screams, all coming out in a howl.

I hurtled out of the open door. Down the hill. Down through the dark. Past the crouching branches of trees. Each footstep created a rhythm for a battle cry. _Torn. Impossible. Can't...take...this. Melissa. Mine. Mine. MINE. Alexander. Kill. Dead. Mine. Dead. DEAD._ Random, miserable fragments of my mind mixed into a strong, pounding rhythm. They ripped through my hopes and remaining good memories._ Mine. DEAD. Mine. MINE. Dead. Dead. _

"Dead, dead, dead," I gasped as I sprinted. The image glazed through my mind. Alexander and Melissa. Kissing. _Kissing._

"Dead, dead, dead!" I threw myself on the dry grass. I pounded my fists. I kicked and screamed on the ground. _Not fair. NOTHING ever right for Meshak. NOTHING. Why can't I be dead? Why? Why should I be here? Why, why WHY?_

It was impossible to think positively. I whacked my distorted head against the cold hard earth. Bang. Bang. Bang. Just like the beat of my heart. I could feel a layer of rock-solid ice growing around it.

"She's MY angel!" I wailed. "Mine!"

If she even knew I existed, she would never have kissed him...would she? Was my angel really just a devil wearing a mask, like my father? How damned stupid could I have been? How could I have allowed the fantasies in my head to trick me into believing that she was my angel?

_You stupid, useless fool. She would NEVER have even gone near a peasant like you. Useless. Foolish. Stupid. Idiot. You fell for the devil's trick. Of course nobody cares for Meshak. Not even Meshak's angel._

My feelings, dissolved in tears turned to rage.  
"MY angel!" I roared. "Mine! MINE!"

Jester whined pitifully, sitting beside me. He nuzzled my face in a caring way. I didn't even notice him. I just let all of my emotion and tears pour onto the ground for the rest of the night.


End file.
